The Steamy Hot Fuzz Slash Fiction Tweets: October 19th, 2009

If you don’t follow myself, Mr Simon Pegg or Mr Nick Frost on Twitter, you missed out on a semi sequel to HOT FUZZ yesterday in the form of some very steamy tweets.

It all started with a discussion about X Factor’s identical twins John & Edward and a joke by me about slash fiction…

@edgarwright Has anyone written John & Edward slash fiction yet? Apart from themselves, that is.
about 23 hours ago from web

@simonpegg @edgarwright Jeez and you had a pop at me for reading Twilight!
about 23 hours ago from TweetDeck

@edgarwright Me and @simonpegg once wrote some Nicholas Angel and Danny Butterman slash fiction. It was called HOT FUZZ…(applause)
about 23 hours ago from web

@simonpegg You’ve still got it Edgar. I don’t care what anyone says.
about 21 hours ago from TweetDeck

… this quickly transmorphed into a discussion about the amount of steamy HOT FUZZ slash fiction on the net involving Sergeant Nicholas Angel and Constable Danny Butterman.

@edgarwright: You want HOT FUZZ slash fiction? You got HOT FUZZ slash fiction. http://bit.ly/EU8SY Enjoy.
about 22 hours ago from web

@simonpegg All power to the slashers I say. I’m deeply flattered that anyone would take mine and @edgarwright’s balls and run with them.
about 21 hours ago from TweetDeck

@edgarwright I too am deeply flattered by the slashers. I say all power to handstitched homoerotica.
about 21 hours ago from web in reply to simonpegg

@simonpegg @yathina I didn’t start it!! It was @edgarwright. You know what it’s like you’re on your own in the edit …
about 22 hours ago from TweetDeck in reply to yathina

@edgarwright More HOT FUZZ slash fiction for those who enjoy Angel & Danny’s stolen glances… http://joandarck.greekedtext.org/HotFuzzMissingOut.html
about 18 hours ago from web

@edgarwright I think I have opened a lusty can of worms…
about 18 hours ago from web

This is turn led to myself, Simon and Nick tweeted our own little slivers of slash fiction chronicling the stolen glances, loaded comments and pregnant pauses between our dynamic duo. And things got very hot and sweaty indeed.

This may be the HOT FUZZ sequel you’ve been begging for. Read on.

@simonpegg “said Danny as he unbuttoned Angel’s police issue riot suit”
about 17 hours ago from TweetDeck in reply to edgarwright

@edgarwright “Danny gripped his extendable Asp. It could do some serious damage…in the right hands.”
about 16 hours ago from web in reply to simonpegg

@nickjfrost “That’s a lovely big truncheon.” said Danny. (sound of slide whistle.) the end.
about 16 hours ago from Tweetie in reply to simonpegg

@edgarwright All this steamy talk of Danny & Angel is sending me toward the 19,000 followers mark. You filthy bitches.
about 16 hours ago from web

@edgarwright “Danny and Angel grinned as they tackled the shoplifter. There was no reason to hold him down so long. Or was there..?”
about 16 hours ago from web

@nickjfrost “he’s got a pipe of pringles down his track suit bottoms Sarge!” grinned Danny.”
about 16 hours ago from Tweetie in reply to edgarwright

@edgarwright “Danny wanted to tell Angel that from some angles he looked a bit like Paul Walker. He’d tell him one day…One day.”
about 16 hours ago from web

@nickjfrost ‘swing away!” Said Danny. They laughed at the memory of going to see signs together one afternoon.
about 16 hours ago from Tweetie in reply to edgarwright

@edgarwright “Danny smiled “Remember when we beat up those travelers in the downpour, Sergeant Angel? ? Your hair looked good in the rain”
about 16 hours ago from web

@edgarwright “Danny gazed at the leaves falling outside the station. He smiled. Rugby season would be starting soon…”
about 15 hours ago from web

@edgarwright I’m enjoying this. Too much…(too much)
about 15 hours ago from web

@edgarwright “Angel gently reminded Danny that his ‘Team Jacob’ t-shirt was not regulation uniform.”
about 15 hours ago from web

@nickjfrost “In the quiet station Danny danced to Sixpence none the richer’s ‘Kiss me’, remembering their weekend in Weston.”
about 15 hours ago from Tweetie in reply to edgarwright

@edgarwright “Danny broke the silence. “Who do you like better, John or Edward?” “I have no strong feeling about it” said Angel, without looking up.”
about 15 hours ago from web

@nickjfrost ‘I saw the way Skinner was looking at you.’ Sighed Danny. ‘Don’t be jealous’ Angel ruffled danny’s hair. ‘Don’t Dad might see!’
about 15 hours ago from Tweetie in reply to edgarwright

@edgarwright One last one…”Have you seen the notebook?” asked Angel, searching furiously in the glove compartment. “Many times” replied Danny fondly.
about 15 hours ago from web

@edgarwright @camposova I think the fact that I have out-slashed Pegg & Frost by 3 to 1 speaks volumes about me. Uh…
about 15 hours ago from web in reply to camposova

@edgarwright Am off out now. Good night all. Hands up who still wants a HOT FUZZ sequel.
about 15 hours ago from web

So that was the further adventures of Angel and Danny. I’ll leave you with Simon’s touching epilogue.

@simonpegg “What shall we do?” Asked Danny, full of puppyish enthusiasm. “Your call Constable Butterman”, purred Angel. Danny smiled, “Willy fight?”
about 12 hours ago from TweetDeck

I cannot say how much we all enjoyed writing these. You slash fiction writers are having way too much fun.

Buh bye.

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  • Steve

    My brain literally just fell off. I love you.

  • http://estora.livejournal.com/ Estora

    Ha! If we’re having fun, it’s because you gentlemen are fuelling us on! You realise that everything you’ve written is Hot Fuzz Canon to us now? ^_~ You guys are awesome.

  • http://estora.livejournal.com/ Estora

    Ha! If we’re having fun, it’s because you gentlemen are fuelling us on! You realise that everything you’ve written is Hot Fuzz Canon to us now? ^_~ You guys are awesome.

  • Mel

    oh my lord this is amazing. i feel extremely late to the party but i don’t care. i have so much respect for you all. long live the slash!

  • Mel

    oh my lord this is amazing. i feel extremely late to the party but i don't care. i have so much respect for you all. long live the slash!

  • http://twitter.com/Sereeena Serena Chen

    Can't believe I missed this.

    This is frakkin' epic.

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  • Chasee

    wow…I actually found myself having the bite my pillow to keep in the giggle whilst reading those tweets xD
    I love Simon, Nick and Edgar so much, and also slash…so much.
    nice to see them all put together in a nice little parcel.
    now excuse me i'm going to go giggle out in the rain and i hope i don't get disolved by an angry god; like a giant borroca
    (god is angry coz he doesn't like slash fans…maybe)

  • Chasee

    wow…I actually found myself having the bite my pillow to keep in the giggle whilst reading those tweets xD
    I love Simon, Nick and Edgar so much, and also slash…so much.
    nice to see them all put together in a nice little parcel.
    now excuse me i'm going to go giggle out in the rain and i hope i don't get disolved by an angry god; like a giant borroca
    (god is angry coz he doesn't like slash fans…maybe)

  • Guest

    more!please!
    Hot Fuzz is true love story.lovely.

    haha!

  • Guest

    more!please!
    Hot Fuzz is true love story.lovely.

    haha!

  • Guest

    more!please!
    Hot Fuzz is true love story.lovely.

    haha!

  • kazzz

    more!
    please!
    Hot Fuzz is hot love story.

    haha!

  • kazzz

    more!
    please!
    Hot Fuzz is hot love story.

    haha!

  • kazzz

    more!
    please!
    Hot Fuzz is hot love story.

    haha!

  • Mosh

    The whole thing had me rolling with laughter. Thanks so much for that!

    - a very amused slash fan. :D

  • Mosh

    The whole thing had me rolling with laughter. Thanks so much for that!

    - a very amused slash fan. :D

  • Mosh

    The whole thing had me rolling with laughter. Thanks so much for that!

    - a very amused slash fan. :D

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  • Claire

    Leave it to you to accidentally enable a fight about slash fanfiction writers.

  • Claire

    Leave it to you to accidentally enable a fight about slash fanfiction writers.

  • http://www.edgarwrighthere.com Edgar Wright

    Please, please, please.

    Stop with all the fighting.

    Let’s make love, not war.

    Have Danny & Angel taught us nothing?

    • http://irisbleufic.livejournal.com irisbleufic

      Lesson #1: Cornettos make everything better.

      (Belated thanks – and astonishment, certainly – to Stitch and plethora below!)

  • http://www.edgarwrighthere.com/ Edgar Wright

    Please, please, please.

    Stop with all the fighting.

    Let’s make love, not war.

    Have Danny & Angel taught us nothing?

    • http://irisbleufic.livejournal.com/ irisbleufic

      Lesson #1: Cornettos make everything better.

      (Belated thanks – and astonishment, certainly – to Stitch and plethora below!)

  • http://lariekoek.deviantart.com Larie

    Hahaha, great! I’m guilty of writing Danny/Nicholas fluff as well, and I sure am enjoying the ideas of the creators themselves!

    Lets hope for this sequel! XD

  • http://lariekoek.deviantart.com/ Larie

    Hahaha, great! I’m guilty of writing Danny/Nicholas fluff as well, and I sure am enjoying the ideas of the creators themselves!

    Lets hope for this sequel! XD

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  • http://blcwriter.livejournal.com blcwriter

    Screw Star Trek slash– I’m going to start writing Hot Fuzz slash now that we’ve been given the go- ahead. Hell, maybe I’ll invent a new genre, zombie-slash fiction. I always thought there was so much love to explore when Shaun kept Ed in the shed.

    I mean, there could be after-hours date nights at the Winchester, long walks on a chain, all that romantic stuff.

    Thanks for such a good laugh.

    • http://community.livejournal.com/sandfordpolice/profile Zed

      RE: Zombie slash – Really hate to burst your bubble, but I think I remember reading something like that. Amazingly, it wasn’t Shaun of the Dead fic, but Hot Fuzz. D:

  • http://blcwriter.livejournal.com/ blcwriter

    Screw Star Trek slash– I’m going to start writing Hot Fuzz slash now that we’ve been given the go- ahead. Hell, maybe I’ll invent a new genre, zombie-slash fiction. I always thought there was so much love to explore when Shaun kept Ed in the shed.

    I mean, there could be after-hours date nights at the Winchester, long walks on a chain, all that romantic stuff.

    Thanks for such a good laugh.

    • http://community.livejournal.com/sandfordpolice/profile Zed

      RE: Zombie slash – Really hate to burst your bubble, but I think I remember reading something like that. Amazingly, it wasn’t Shaun of the Dead fic, but Hot Fuzz. D:

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  • Slick

    Willy fight. Such a lovely coda to it all.

  • http://community.livejournal.com/sandfordpolice/profile Zed

    This was the best fun I’ve ever had on the internet. You guys are fantastic!

  • http://community.livejournal.com/sandfordpolice/profile Zed

    This was the best fun I’ve ever had on the internet. You guys are fantastic!

  • Gen

    You realise this counts as canon to us now, right? ;p

  • Gen

    You realise this counts as canon to us now, right? ;p

  • http://www.twitter.com/fadingstarlite jessie

    And that was the first thing I saw when I opened my TweetDeck yesterday. LOL.

    Thanks so much again for the giggles. While it did nothing for my cracked ribs, I enjoyed it regardless. =)

    – Jessie

  • http://www.twitter.com/fadingstarlite jessie

    And that was the first thing I saw when I opened my TweetDeck yesterday. LOL.

    Thanks so much again for the giggles. While it did nothing for my cracked ribs, I enjoyed it regardless. =)

    – Jessie

  • http://joelvalliefilms.com/ Joel Vallie

    @edgarwright “Danny wanted to tell Angel that from some angles he looked a bit like Paul Walker. He’d tell him one day…One day.”

    This one made me lose it. Funny stuff.

  • http://joelvalliefilms.com/ Joel Vallie

    @edgarwright “Danny wanted to tell Angel that from some angles he looked a bit like Paul Walker. He’d tell him one day…One day.”

    This one made me lose it. Funny stuff.

  • a.q.

    “You slash fiction writers are having way too much fun.”

    Yes!

    Thumbs up for being cool and great about it. Much fan love for you :)

  • a.q.

    “You slash fiction writers are having way too much fun.”

    Yes!

    Thumbs up for being cool and great about it. Much fan love for you :)

  • Eva

    *shivers* That was sooo much fun to watch, but it was oh soooo creepy! I couldn’t stop laughing.

  • Eva

    *shivers* That was sooo much fun to watch, but it was oh soooo creepy! I couldn’t stop laughing.

  • schribaere

    Welcome to the dark side…

    (which is so much fun.)

  • schribaere

    Welcome to the dark side…

    (which is so much fun.)

  • http://twitter.com/TMacPhisto Ana Carolina

    Thank you for reminding me of the awesomeness of slash fiction! I hadn’t read in ages! Now I will cath up on my stories and, of course, add Hot Fuzz slash to my list!

  • http://twitter.com/TMacPhisto Ana Carolina

    Thank you for reminding me of the awesomeness of slash fiction! I hadn’t read in ages! Now I will cath up on my stories and, of course, add Hot Fuzz slash to my list!

  • http://slangards.i.ph/ Dennis

    You guys crack me up! I’m betting “willy fight” becomes the next interweb meme.

    And I’ll buy that Hot Fuzz sequel if I have to ship it here from the UK just to see it.

  • Slick

    Willy fight. Such a lovely coda to it all.

  • Fireproof

    Huh, and here I thought slash fiction was written primarily by frustrated, lonely women who can’t make it with men. Can’t even picture themselves making it with men. Terrified at the very idea of making it with men. So they write about men making it with men, because in their narrow existence, it seems like men have all the fun. *snort*

    Slash is pretty pitiful, actually, especially when it’s written about cartoon characters (yes, the authors stoop that low). But the palaver above read more like a satire of slash, so it was fun for me too. Kudos!

    • wat

      BAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW I AM OUTRAGED AND INSULTED BY THIS COMMENT AND I WILL NOT STAND FOR IT AND I WILL WRITE ANGSTY, DIRTY HOT MAN SEX IN RETALIATION AND I HOPE YOU FEEL ASHAMED FOR PUSHING ME PAST MY LIMIT HRNNNNNGNNNGGHHHH

      • Fireproof

        Oh, my god, I’m an enabler. I’m so ashamed.

    • Gen

      Awww, someone’s bitter. I suppose you think men jacking off to (fictional, as all is) porn (normally lesbian!) is just for loser saddos who can’t land women (or men) and are scared of the thought?

      No? Funny, that.

      Now leave me to my hot mansex and shut it. :P

      • Fireproof

        Aww, someone’s just admitted they’re a frustrated, lonely woman. So sorry, dear. I bet an extreme makeover and a lonely hearts club would wonders for you. But that would take initiative and guts, so enjoy your “hot mansex”, which apparently exists for you only on a computer screen. Tsk!

        • xenoglossy

          Oh, so you never watch porn, then?

        • Gen

          Tell it to my gorgeous girlfriend, mate. ;) Let me tell ya; she ain’t complaining about anything.

        • LOL

          Clearly you know something the rest of us don’t! Thank you so much for enlightening everyone here that they are lonely, sad frustrated women. I don’t know what the rest of us would have done without your insight!

          I guess that means everything you’re interested in is something you’d show to your grandmother then, right? I guess it goes without saying! *pearlclutch*

    • http://twitter.com/TMacPhisto Ana Carolina

      ROTFLMAO
      It’s obvious you know women so.very.well!

      • Fireproof

        OH come now. What’s this “know women” jazz? You really think all women share your fixation? Feh. This one doesn’t. Loves the satire, though. Hilarious! Why wasn’t “Will and Grace” ever that funny?

        • http://twitter.com/TMacPhisto Ana Carolina

          I don’t think all women share my “fixation” but the ones I do are nothing like you describe.
          I always thought women who don’t like slash were excessively uptight, I mean, what’s there not to like?

          And Will and Grace wasn’t ever that funny cause they focused on the wrong characters, the show should’ve clearly been called Jack and Karen

          • http://community.livejournal.com/sandfordpolice/profile Zed

            Oh, goodness, yes. I would so watch Jack and Karen. Every night, with a bowl of popcorn.

    • Zoe

      Wait … WHAT? Um, no. Just no.

    • Amused
    • LOL

      Oh my. It’s so sad that you think this is satire. Sadder still is your puny, narrow view of women who write fiction. You have no fricking idea! *falls over laughing*

      • Fireproof

        Your puny, narrow view of fiction is even more laughable, sweetie.

        • LOL

          So, because I like slash and you don’t, MY views of fiction are puny and narrow? Clearly, that means my life is bereft of the joys of all other forms of fiction, normal social relationships and even happiness.(!)

          Way to generalize pretty much everyone outside of your pompous point of view.

          And I’m not your sweetie. OMG, does that make me a hostile unhappy woman? I need you to tell me who I am, O Sage of All Fiction! *sobs*

    • amanita muscaria

      Who’s that trip-trapping over my bridge?

    • Rich

      Oh, do grow up.

      p.s. men write it too.

      • FuzzieFan

        I’m finding all this hilarious since one of the very best slash writers I know is a lesbian.

        • Bee

          This! Thank you! I’m a lesbian and in a long-term committed relationship and I write and read slash … and femmeslash but we’re just talking about the mansex here ;D

    • Cass

      I think the question here is why are you so bothered by this stuff that you feel the need to insult the people who like it. Not trying to start a fight. I’m genuinely curious.

    • http://community.livejournal.com/sandfordpolice/profile Zed

      Oh, come on. Most of us are married. Some of us even have husbands who (unfortunately) participate in the fandom. And, yes. Even they write their share of slash.

  • http://slangards.i.ph/ Dennis

    You guys crack me up! I’m betting “willy fight” becomes the next interweb meme.

    And I’ll buy that Hot Fuzz sequel if I have to ship it here from the UK just to see it.

  • Fireproof

    Huh, and here I thought slash fiction was written primarily by frustrated, lonely women who can’t make it with men. Can’t even picture themselves making it with men. Terrified at the very idea of making it with men. So they write about men making it with men, because in their narrow existence, it seems like men have all the fun. *snort*

    Slash is pretty pitiful, actually, especially when it’s written about cartoon characters (yes, the authors stoop that low). But the palaver above read more like a satire of slash, so it was fun for me too. Kudos!

    • wat

      BAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW I AM OUTRAGED AND INSULTED BY THIS COMMENT AND I WILL NOT STAND FOR IT AND I WILL WRITE ANGSTY, DIRTY HOT MAN SEX IN RETALIATION AND I HOPE YOU FEEL ASHAMED FOR PUSHING ME PAST MY LIMIT HRNNNNNGNNNGGHHHH

      • Fireproof

        Oh, my god, I’m an enabler. I’m so ashamed.

    • Gen

      Awww, someone’s bitter. I suppose you think men jacking off to (fictional, as all is) porn (normally lesbian!) is just for loser saddos who can’t land women (or men) and are scared of the thought?

      No? Funny, that.

      Now leave me to my hot mansex and shut it. :P

      • Fireproof

        Aww, someone’s just admitted they’re a frustrated, lonely woman. So sorry, dear. I bet an extreme makeover and a lonely hearts club would wonders for you. But that would take initiative and guts, so enjoy your “hot mansex”, which apparently exists for you only on a computer screen. Tsk!

        • xenoglossy

          Oh, so you never watch porn, then?

        • Gen

          Tell it to my gorgeous girlfriend, mate. ;) Let me tell ya; she ain’t complaining about anything.

        • LOL

          Clearly you know something the rest of us don’t! Thank you so much for enlightening everyone here that they are lonely, sad frustrated women. I don’t know what the rest of us would have done without your insight!

          I guess that means everything you’re interested in is something you’d show to your grandmother then, right? I guess it goes without saying! *pearlclutch*

    • http://twitter.com/TMacPhisto Ana Carolina

      ROTFLMAO
      It’s obvious you know women so.very.well!

      • Fireproof

        OH come now. What’s this “know women” jazz? You really think all women share your fixation? Feh. This one doesn’t. Loves the satire, though. Hilarious! Why wasn’t “Will and Grace” ever that funny?

        • http://twitter.com/TMacPhisto Ana Carolina

          I don’t think all women share my “fixation” but the ones I do are nothing like you describe.
          I always thought women who don’t like slash were excessively uptight, I mean, what’s there not to like?

          And Will and Grace wasn’t ever that funny cause they focused on the wrong characters, the show should’ve clearly been called Jack and Karen

          • http://community.livejournal.com/sandfordpolice/profile Zed

            Oh, goodness, yes. I would so watch Jack and Karen. Every night, with a bowl of popcorn.

    • Zoe

      Wait … WHAT? Um, no. Just no.

    • Amused
    • LOL

      Oh my. It’s so sad that you think this is satire. Sadder still is your puny, narrow view of women who write fiction. You have no fricking idea! *falls over laughing*

      • Fireproof

        Your puny, narrow view of fiction is even more laughable, sweetie.

        • LOL

          So, because I like slash and you don’t, MY views of fiction are puny and narrow? Clearly, that means my life is bereft of the joys of all other forms of fiction, normal social relationships and even happiness.(!)

          Way to generalize pretty much everyone outside of your pompous point of view.

          And I’m not your sweetie. OMG, does that make me a hostile unhappy woman? I need you to tell me who I am, O Sage of All Fiction! *sobs*

    • amanita muscaria

      Who’s that trip-trapping over my bridge?

    • Rich

      Oh, do grow up.

      p.s. men write it too.

      • FuzzieFan

        I’m finding all this hilarious since one of the very best slash writers I know is a lesbian.

        • Bee

          This! Thank you! I’m a lesbian and in a long-term committed relationship and I write and read slash … and femmeslash but we’re just talking about the mansex here ;D

    • Cass

      I think the question here is why are you so bothered by this stuff that you feel the need to insult the people who like it. Not trying to start a fight. I’m genuinely curious.

    • http://community.livejournal.com/sandfordpolice/profile Zed

      Oh, come on. Most of us are married. Some of us even have husbands who (unfortunately) participate in the fandom. And, yes. Even they write their share of slash.

  • AMBERgrindstaff

    I love it

    Will there be more ?!

    ;)

  • AmberGrindstaff

    I love it

    Will there be more ?!

    ;)

  • angle

    Could’nt leave you out of the fun Edgar, here’s one starring you, enjoy!!!!

    Danny was exited…………today was shaping up to be a fantabulous day an no mistake.
    In a change from the usual dreary routine of moving on jugglers and mime artists, his dad had just told him that he and Sergeant Angel would be looking after a celebrity, no less than the famous film director Edgar Wright!!!!
    As Angel walked in past the booking desk Danny excitedly intercepted him. ” Now then, nickle arse my good friend, guess what we’re doing today” his excitement almost palpable.
    “Chasing Swan’s?” ventured Angel, “Neope, guess again” replied Danny, “breaking your addiction to violent movies” tried Angel, ” Jog on, neope, today…….we are gonna be looking after Edgar Wright!!! ”
    ” Who the heck is Edward white?” asked Angel, “not Edward White,you plum,Edgar Wright, the famous film directoror” corrected Danny, “Still don’t know him…….should I?” asked Angel.
    “You know, him what done ‘Shaun’s A Bit Red’ and that popular youth sitcom ‘Spazzed’ ” enthused Danny.
    “Ive never been a big fan of televised entertainment Danny, as you well know” replied Angel, tersely, he was no fan of these Hollywood types with their big swoopy hair and humvee’s…….no he was more one for quiet country walks with good companions and wrestling naked in front of a roaring log fire………..stop it, he thought as he managed to repress the errant images racing into his mind, making his pulse race and his face turn pink.
    “You allright Angel?” asked Danny
    “Yes dear……er Danny” he fumbled, “So what will be the purpose of this Edward,sorry Edgar’s visit?”
    “He’s only gonna make a documentary about about Sandford Police Force” beamed Danny, “Service,Danny!!”
    “No, he’s not holding a service, just making a program, called ‘Hard Fuzz’ or at least that’s what Doris said he done said to er on the phone, but she ad a hard time understanding his hollywood accent.”
    One hour later…
    “Here he is, just pulling up outside in his Humvee” said Danny as the Hollywood star arrived in his bright pink motorcade of matching Humvee’s.
    The station doors swept open and in strolled the most imposing figure of a man Angel had ever encountered,not easily impressed by fame and riches there was something nevertheless breath taking about this man and Angel felt his pulse racing as he attempted to maintain his decorum as Edgar Wright approached him.
    Dressed in a salmon pink Zoot suit and sporting a bright pink Fedora hat with an ostrich feather dyed pink all finished off with patent leather pink spats and trailing a pink rubber cape was Five feet two inches of the most fascinating creature Angel had ever seen.

    “Well Hallo Honky Tonk” purred Edgar “aren’t you a big one” he snipped at Danny with a sidelong up and down look and turned to Angel “Oh my, Robo-cock” he playfully offered as Angel summoned his composure to greet the great man. ” Wuh, Welcome Mr Wright sir it’s our pleasure to have you sir” stumbled sergeant Angel.
    “Ooh, you are awful………..but i like you” shreiked Edgar smacking him on the chest for good measure and taking his arm, “show me round this station of yours then flyboy ”
    ‘Yes’ thought Sergeant Angel, ‘Today may very well be a good day’

    • FairyGodmoose

      Oh dear. XD

      • angle

        All in jest fairygodmoose, don’t blow a gasket ; )

        • FairyGodmoose

          XD = laughing face.

          • angle

            Then I apologise unreservedly.
            not up to speed on this interweb emooticon business.
            Heck, I’m still watching my Dick Emery video cassette’s on a black and white Decca portable.

  • http://blogs.myspace.com/angleart angleart

    Could’nt leave you out of the fun Edgar, here’s one starring you, enjoy!!!!

    Danny was exited…………today was shaping up to be a fantabulous day an no mistake.
    In a change from the usual dreary routine of moving on jugglers and mime artists, his dad had just told him that he and Sergeant Angel would be looking after a celebrity, no less than the famous film director Edgar Wright!!!!
    As Angel walked in past the booking desk Danny excitedly intercepted him. ” Now then, nickle arse my good friend, guess what we’re doing today” his excitement almost palpable.
    “Chasing Swan’s?” ventured Angel, “Neope, guess again” replied Danny, “breaking your addiction to violent movies” tried Angel, ” Jog on, neope, today…….we are gonna be looking after Edgar Wright!!! ”
    ” Who the heck is Edward white?” asked Angel, “not Edward White,you plum,Edgar Wright, the famous film directoror” corrected Danny, “Still don’t know him…….should I?” asked Angel.
    “You know, him what done ‘Shaun’s A Bit Red’ and that popular youth sitcom ‘Spazzed’ ” enthused Danny.
    “Ive never been a big fan of televised entertainment Danny, as you well know” replied Angel, tersely, he was no fan of these Hollywood types with their big swoopy hair and humvee’s…….no he was more one for quiet country walks with good companions and wrestling naked in front of a roaring log fire………..stop it, he thought as he managed to repress the errant images racing into his mind, making his pulse race and his face turn pink.
    “You allright Angel?” asked Danny
    “Yes dear……er Danny” he fumbled, “So what will be the purpose of this Edward,sorry Edgar’s visit?”
    “He’s only gonna make a documentary about about Sandford Police Force” beamed Danny, “Service,Danny!!”
    “No, he’s not holding a service, just making a program, called ‘Hard Fuzz’ or at least that’s what Doris said he done said to er on the phone, but she ad a hard time understanding his hollywood accent.”
    One hour later…
    “Here he is, just pulling up outside in his Humvee” said Danny as the Hollywood star arrived in his bright pink motorcade of matching Humvee’s.
    The station doors swept open and in strolled the most imposing figure of a man Angel had ever encountered,not easily impressed by fame and riches there was something nevertheless breath taking about this man and Angel felt his pulse racing as he attempted to maintain his decorum as Edgar Wright approached him.
    Dressed in a salmon pink Zoot suit and sporting a bright pink Fedora hat with an ostrich feather dyed pink all finished off with patent leather pink spats and trailing a pink rubber cape was Five feet two inches of the most fascinating creature Angel had ever seen.

    “Well Hallo Honky Tonk” purred Edgar “aren’t you a big one” he snipped at Danny with a sidelong up and down look and turned to Angel “Oh my, Robo-cock” he playfully offered as Angel summoned his composure to greet the great man. ” Wuh, Welcome Mr Wright sir it’s our pleasure to have you sir” stumbled sergeant Angel.
    “Ooh, you are awful………..but i like you” shreiked Edgar smacking him on the chest for good measure and taking his arm, “show me round this station of yours then flyboy ”
    ‘Yes’ thought Sergeant Angel, ‘Today may very well be a good day’

    • FairyGodmoose

      Oh dear. XD

      • http://blogs.myspace.com/angleart angleart

        All in jest fairygodmoose, don’t blow a gasket ; )

        • FairyGodmoose

          XD = laughing face.

          • http://blogs.myspace.com/angleart angleart

            Then I apologise unreservedly.
            not up to speed on this interweb emooticon business.
            Heck, I’m still watching my Dick Emery video cassette’s on a black and white Decca portable.

  • http://www.krisjacque.com Kris

    I said it once and I’ll say it again: you guys made my boring day a lot funnier.

  • http://www.krisjacque.com/ Kris

    I said it once and I’ll say it again: you guys made my boring day a lot funnier.

  • plethora

    Stitch, you beat me to it. Does iris know you linked her? :D

    MOAR PLSKTHX!

  • plethora

    Stitch, you beat me to it. Does iris know you linked her? :D

    MOAR PLSKTHX!

  • Zoe

    Hey, Edgar. I just wanted to tell you how completely awesome you are. I was present for much of the slashy fun yesterday and almost died laughing. But more than that, it’s really amazing to see celebs acknowledging their slash following in such a positive way, because it really is meant as a compliment to you guys and your work. Thank you, Ed! You, Simon and Nick are wonderful, beautiful men.

  • Zoe

    Hey, Edgar. I just wanted to tell you how completely awesome you are. I was present for much of the slashy fun yesterday and almost died laughing. But more than that, it’s really amazing to see celebs acknowledging their slash following in such a positive way, because it really is meant as a compliment to you guys and your work. Thank you, Ed! You, Simon and Nick are wonderful, beautiful men.

  • angle

    “No, Lorna he’s a wrong un,don’t marry him” cried Constable Danny Butterman at the television.
    It was video night at Danny’s again and as ever Sergeant Nicolas Angel was with his favourite partner/pal.
    Fearing that his friend was too dependant on violent movies, Angel decided that a little’ re-education’ so to speak, wouldn’t go amiss
    “Did you know R.D Blackmore has been described as ‘proud, shy, reticent, strong-willed, sweet-tempered, and self-centred.’ a bit like someone I know” ventured Angel, ” Naw, get out soft lad” replied Danny, blushing to the tips of his toes.
    ” Though very popular in his time, Blackmore’s work has since been altogether ignored Consequently, his reputation rests chiefly upon his romantic work Lorna Doone, in spite of the fact that it was not his personal favourite” continued Angel.
    “Jog on, cor you dun arf know your onions” said Danny
    “I’d like to know your onions” countered Angel
    “What?” Danny asked, slightly puzzled
    “Nothing ! ” replied Angel
    Hopefully the room was dark enough that Danny wouldn’t see his blushes.

  • http://blogs.myspace.com/angleart angleart

    “No, Lorna he’s a wrong un,don’t marry him” cried Constable Danny Butterman at the television.
    It was video night at Danny’s again and as ever Sergeant Nicolas Angel was with his favourite partner/pal.
    Fearing that his friend was too dependant on violent movies, Angel decided that a little’ re-education’ so to speak, wouldn’t go amiss
    “Did you know R.D Blackmore has been described as ‘proud, shy, reticent, strong-willed, sweet-tempered, and self-centred.’ a bit like someone I know” ventured Angel, ” Naw, get out soft lad” replied Danny, blushing to the tips of his toes.
    ” Though very popular in his time, Blackmore’s work has since been altogether ignored Consequently, his reputation rests chiefly upon his romantic work Lorna Doone, in spite of the fact that it was not his personal favourite” continued Angel.
    “Jog on, cor you dun arf know your onions” said Danny
    “I’d like to know your onions” countered Angel
    “What?” Danny asked, slightly puzzled
    “Nothing ! ” replied Angel
    Hopefully the room was dark enough that Danny wouldn’t see his blushes.

  • http://umeki.deviantart.com Krystal

    I adore it. Way too much. <3

  • http://umeki.deviantart.com/ Krystal

    I adore it. Way too much. <3

  • http://www.margomusing.blogspot.com Marjorie

    I now want the sequel even more than I did before…

  • http://www.margomusing.blogspot.com/ Marjorie

    I now want the sequel even more than I did before…

  • a fan

    Hahaha! Everyone’s linking to this all over LiveJournal. You are all hilarious and infamous!

    Thanks for having a sense of humour about pervy fangirls having a bit of fun with your characters. :D

  • a fan

    Hahaha! Everyone’s linking to this all over LiveJournal. You are all hilarious and infamous!

    Thanks for having a sense of humour about pervy fangirls having a bit of fun with your characters. :D

  • angle

    Danny drizzled the olive oil on his panini and handed the bottle to Angel who was preparing the salad,…….”How’d you like it big man?”………”Tossed”, came the reply.
    They laughed……….like a pair of carefree schoolboys on a moist summer’s eve.

  • http://blogs.myspace.com/angleart angleart

    Danny drizzled the olive oil on his panini and handed the bottle to Angel who was preparing the salad,…….”How’d you like it big man?”………”Tossed”, came the reply.
    They laughed……….like a pair of carefree schoolboys on a moist summer’s eve.

  • Stitch

    If you want seriously well-written HF slash, this girl is good:

    http://irisbleufic.livejournal.com/

  • Stitch

    If you want seriously well-written HF slash, this girl is good:

    http://irisbleufic.livejournal.com/

  • angle

    He’s Quite light on his feet for a larger man, thought Sergeant Angel, as he walked in on Constable Butterman dancing in his pants to the ‘We buy any car’ advert

  • http://blogs.myspace.com/angleart angleart

    He’s Quite light on his feet for a larger man, thought Sergeant Angel, as he walked in on Constable Butterman dancing in his pants to the ‘We buy any car’ advert

  • theredwitch

    I couldn’t sleep last night at all…. And this, this wonderful disgustingly filthy fan fiction was the ONLY thing that kept me sane last night…..

    More, More, MORE!!!!!!

    Encore!

  • theredwitch

    I couldn’t sleep last night at all…. And this, this wonderful disgustingly filthy fan fiction was the ONLY thing that kept me sane last night…..

    More, More, MORE!!!!!!

    Encore!

  • angle

    Sergeant Angel sighed……. as he observed the delicate pat of golden butter melt languidly into the rugged landscape of his crumpet.
    Standing there at his kitchen counter, mentally preparing himself for the day ahead… ” Y’know, Danny…..there aren’t many things finer in life than a dripping crumpet” he expounded to his ever-reliable partner and general…life friend…Constable Danny Butterman as said Police constable walked in and took a seat at the kitchen table.
    “Yer” responded Danny,with a smile,” but put some pants eh…’ Knickerless’… ”
    “Aah…yes,….silly me” replied Angel.

    Sorry, couldn’t resist, have a good day trying to keep that image out of your head ; )

  • http://blogs.myspace.com/angleart angleart

    Sergeant Angel sighed……. as he observed the delicate pat of golden butter melt languidly into the rugged landscape of his crumpet.
    Standing there at his kitchen counter, mentally preparing himself for the day ahead… ” Y’know, Danny…..there aren’t many things finer in life than a dripping crumpet” he expounded to his ever-reliable partner and general…life friend…Constable Danny Butterman as said Police constable walked in and took a seat at the kitchen table.
    “Yer” responded Danny,with a smile,” but put some pants eh…’ Knickerless’… ”
    “Aah…yes,….silly me” replied Angel.

    Sorry, couldn’t resist, have a good day trying to keep that image out of your head ; )

  • http://corpulent.wordpress.com Frances

    I was in tears reading these last night – so so hilarious.

    Also, it was the sexual tension that made Hot Fuzz. The two of them getting together in Hot Fuzz 2 would be like Mulder and Scully getting in the X-Files – expected, but ultimately disappointing.

  • http://corpulent.wordpress.com/ Frances

    I was in tears reading these last night – so so hilarious.

    Also, it was the sexual tension that made Hot Fuzz. The two of them getting together in Hot Fuzz 2 would be like Mulder and Scully getting in the X-Files – expected, but ultimately disappointing.

  • http://twitter.com/freezeray Lexy

    It started out hilarious and progressively got more and more uncomfortable until I felt like some kind of pervert snooping in at your unexplored fantasies… that being said MORE PLEASE! x

  • http://twitter.com/freezeray Lexy

    It started out hilarious and progressively got more and more uncomfortable until I felt like some kind of pervert snooping in at your unexplored fantasies… that being said MORE PLEASE! x

  • hopetomany

    “You slash fiction writers are having way too much fun.”
    – Slash is like ‘the rhythm’. It’s gonna get you ;-)

  • hopetomany

    “You slash fiction writers are having way too much fun.”
    – Slash is like ‘the rhythm’. It’s gonna get you ;-)